I feel like my heart has been ripped from its hinges and now hangs loosely, swaying recklessly to and fro. I mustered all the courage I had. Really, I did. I acted out on a spontaneous whim, leaving the most silliest of sentences on your wall. You don't understand how much I riled myself up in thinking of things to say to you. I spent weeks lying in bed, my thoughts keeping me from sleeping and trying to string up a sentence that would throw things into action. And I did it. I left a comment on your wall and for a day you went without facebook. I figured that maybe you were just busy. The next day, you were commenting other people, completely disregarding my comment. Do you know how much that comment is worth? Tedious specks of time that comprised these past few months I was wrapping my head around you. And how easily it was disregarded! I don't know whether or not to laugh or weep. To giggle or shake my head. It is now apparent to me that perhaps you have moved on.
And that perhaps, I should, too, but right now I wish my heart would stop leaking tears. It's hard to focus through dewy eyes.
09 July 2010
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i love your blog.
ReplyDeletewhat you write, you write very beautifully :)